Frustration

I’m tired of being tired and not feeling well. Yesterday was particularly bad. I couldn’t seem to stay awake very long, and I felt like crap. I woke in the middle of the night with cramps and nausea. Taking one of my anti-nausea pills helped with the nausea but not with the cramps. I felt as if I had eaten ground glass and it was eating me from the inside out.

Chemotherapy attacks rapidly multiplying cells, which include not only the cancer cells, but hair, nails, and mucus membrane, which is what lines the gastro-intestinal tract. That’s why nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, and hair loss are often side effects of chemotherapy. My hair and nails are fine at the moment, but my GI tract isn’t. I have three different anti-nausea pills; one for mild, one for moderate, and one for severe.

The side effects are cumulative, and this is the third week of three for this drug combination. I’ve noticed that Wednesday into Thursday are when the side effects are at their worst. And yesterday was the worst it has been so far; not counting the first round of the combination that knocked me on my butt. I won’t be getting chemo next week but will start another 3-week course on Monday the 23rd after more blood work and another CT scan.

Today, more hair came out. It seems to be a day of hair coming out and then nothing for a week or so. I’m thinking my good shampoo and conditioner might have something to do with my hair still being there. Who knows? But at least today my GI tract has calmed down a bit, and I stayed awake all day.

Next week should be better.

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6 thoughts on “Frustration

  1. saundragoodman says:

    What could be worse than the constant side effects of cramps and nausea? Even with the anti-nausea pills? It’s just a rotten, lousy situation. Thank goodness they’re giving you a week off. I know you have to go through it to fight this horrid disease, but it sucks and I hate that you’re going through it! I’m glad today was better and that you get a break from it next week to pull your reserves together. Of course you’re frustrated. I hope you felt a bit better after writing this blog.

  2. Ditto on what Saundra said. Crap, crap and yuck! I hate that you’re going through all of this, and am enraged that the treatment for cancer is still so barbaric and brutal after all of these years. We ought to be further along than this. I know research is promising – right here in Ottawa where I live, researchers are on the brink of brand new treatments that are working in cancer patients who are doing the clinic trials as a last resort. That’s exciting! But how long before it’s on the market. It grieves me to watch you go through this. I just continue to lift you in prayer and hope that the chemo, as barbaric as it is, is sucking those tumors right out of your body. xoxoxo

  3. I just keep holding on to the thought that the chemo is killing the tumors even as it’s making me feel crappy. At least it’s not as bad as the first combination they gave me. 🙂

Ruth passed away from cancer. Please remove from list

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